Over a year.....

It's been over a year since I last posted and I hope there is no one out there following this blog,long ago forgotten to unsubscribe. I need to talk without judgement, opinion or comment. I know.....
As a parent I wanted my children to have a better life than I. Not more things but security, love, support and encouragement. I wanted my children to always know that they had my unconditional love, that they could do anything they wanted and get a degree. I wanted them to know that they could marry and have a good life, a home and family. I wanted them to know how to stand on their own but know I had their back.
I must say, out loud, in print, to myself that I didn't do it. My weakness damaged them. My bad decisions warped their lives and even now I am unable to do the right thing. I'm tired of hurting them. I'm tired of hurting.